Confront it or Let it Go???

So many times it seems I (and probably you too) am faced with people who just do not do things right.....I know many of you are immediately thinking (just like my mom does)...Everybody doesn't do it your way Jed.....But I am not talking about things like leaving the lid off the toothpaste or not keeping the ketchup lid clean...I am talking about right living.....Let clarify something before I continue...I do not think I am perfect nor have I ever thought it.. I can echo what Paul said "I am the chief sinner"..I am just typing here......Anyway...there are people we work with, hang out with, go to church with, and pass by everyday who claim to know "right from wrong" and claim to be "good" people but their actions just do not reflect that..There attitudes are rotten, they talk about everybody, they don't pull there weight, the cuss, drink and chew, and go with girls who do!!!!!.(that was just something funny that my old BSU director used to say..not meant to offend anyone). My question is...when do you say something to those people????? I mean I want people to tell me about areas of my life that may not reflect Christ and I think we are commanded to do so based on Scripture. But when do we tell others....Do we do it everytime...somtimes....a little bit of the time.........and most importantly how do we say it....Should it be firm, gentle....I know the Scripture gives lots of commands about speaking in love to one another, but sometimes isn't a good ole butt chewing a way to show love......(Sorry to say butt chewing...I just didn't know how else to say it. :0) I struggle with this on a daily basis as a teacher and as a disciple of Christ.....Do I fuss at my kids every time they are off task....some days all I would do is fuss...They would hate school!!! Sometimes I think if we confronted our brothers and sisters every time the failed they would simply give up and quit trying....Lord knows if I hear one more person say.."its not what you say; its how you say it....I might go nuts! I am trying to say things better...honestly I am..... This is just a little insight into my mind and the thoughts I have..I have been contemplating this thought for a while. I really don't think there is a right or wrong answer to the question...It was just something to think about while I was waiting on another late bus......Tell me what you think!!